A 10-year-old calls an adult woman or man 'sweetie.'
Sounds ridiculous, doesn't it? Children should not use these endearments with older people. It is the unstated right of older people to use these endearments with children. But, not the other way around.
And that is the crux of the problem. Using an endearment implies that the listener is a child.
Imagine this: A 30-year-old calls an unrelated 60-year-old "honey."
That sounds worse. And, it is exponentially worse if the older person is a supervisor. It is just as bad if the roles are reversed. A supervisor should not call a subordinate "honey," since it at minimum implies disrespect and can even be interpreted as sexual harassment.
The fact is endearments are for family and intimates. In that context, calling someone honey or sweetie is a term of affection.
To be sure, in some cultures in the U.S. endearments are more frequently used, even with strangers. But this is considered unacceptable in the workplace. These terms imply disrespect, even if that is not the intent of the speaker.
Using a person's name, on the other hand, speaks volumes about respect because, especially in the case of a supervisor, it shows the person is known.
Some experts recommend having a conversation with a supervisor who uses endearments, discussing why endearments are not flattering.
However, the offended party could also just say quietly, when the offense happens, "I mean no offense, but don't call me honey."
