The kids are fighting and their rivalry is about to drive mom and dad crazy.
Name-calling, arguing, or physically fighting — sibling rivalry can take many forms and escalate quickly, according to the Center for Parenting Education.
House rules are an essential starting point, even though the kids will ignore them. Some examples: words only in a dispute and boundaries for personal possessions and spaces.
Once the rules are in place, walk older children through the stages of conflict resolution: each child expresses their point of view and listens to the other. Then, they generate possible solutions, and decide on one together.
Use a 'green light to red light' guideline to decide when to intervene.
Usual bickering or name-calling signifies a green light and parents should stay out of it.
An orange light means that there is a potential of play fighting turning real. Parents should intervene to tone down the emotions.
If physical or emotional harm is about to or has already occurred, this is a red light and demands that the parent intervene immediately, review the rules, and impose consequences.
Rick Good spent ten years in the newspaper business, including with The News & Observer (Raleigh, NC) and The Greenville News (Greenville, SC). He co-wrote, with Melinda Coleman, Rutledge to Riley: Governors of South Carolina, 1776–Present (Published by The Greenville News), and is the author of Mind Games Trivia #1 (Amazon). He has recently spent 15 years creating original trivia content through Sounds Good Mobile Entertainment and continues that with his new company, SGME Software. He edits The Smart Reader’s money, real estate, and business coverage.