Discussion can be stimulating. A little banter and cordial debate can be fun. But when everyone hides behind screens, it's easy to get stuck on "winning" a discussion, and for everything to quickly spiral into undisguised nastiness. It can be difficult to tear yourself away from the back-and-forth that can waste hours of your time and crater your mood before you know it.
The obvious solution: Just don't do it. But that's easier said than done in a social media ecosystem that pulls us in and doesn't let go. Here are a few tips to help you put down the phone and reclaim your time (and sanity).
* Don't post something controversial in a public space (like social media) if you don't want to argue about it.
* If you still want to share, don't start or participate in arguments. Interact with people you actually know and stick to your honest thoughts and feelings without attacking others.
* If someone responds in a way that invites argument, don't engage — just hide or delete the comment, if possible.
* Turn off notifications. If you don't see when someone comments, you're unlikely to get sucked into an argument.
* Consider what you add or receive from the discussion. Does arguing change or solve anything? Are you really getting anything out of this?
* Deactive or limit your account. You might miss it at first, but you'll be surprised at how quickly that feeling passes.
Rick Good spent ten years in the newspaper business, including with The News & Observer (Raleigh, NC) and The Greenville News (Greenville, SC). He co-wrote, with Melinda Coleman, Rutledge to Riley: Governors of South Carolina, 1776–Present (Published by The Greenville News), and is the author of Mind Games Trivia #1 (Amazon). He has recently spent 15 years creating original trivia content through Sounds Good Mobile Entertainment and continues that with his new company, SGME Software. He edits The Smart Reader’s money, real estate, and business coverage.
